---

...suckling noises,embodied my surroundings,clinging arms tiny and frailed. why do you continue to cry,when this body of mine cringe with the smell of the atmosphere about me?

 

loose the grip that is emerging sweat running about my brow,where am i going? did i not tell you thus far that i'm yours never to leave nor desert my pain and soreness.

 

my oath as your bread and butter,is to insure that all will be given unto you..no matter the cost. for it was not a decision of your to enter a realm that has bounced you from pillow to pole,and you're continually bearing the look that i've seen so many times forth coming.

 

you've seen that light that was off in the distance,thinking that one day in time it would come near enough to bring you from the refuge from where you dwelled.

 

dreams they call,returning you to the imaginative steps amongst those that were inhabitants of a distant land,no more do we hear the groaning sounds of the agony in which they harbored.

 

took without asking,laid where never invited,pounced and danced in merriment,over the excitement of celebration. this was done so that never would i let you forget about the trails,mountains and valleys from whence your blood trampled on hollow grounds.

 

past may always remain the past,but hisory of long ventures shall constantly repeat itself,if the mind doesn's change it's

directions/directives of the future and what you'll demand of yourself.

 

my off springs didn't have any knowledge of the broken promises that was to be,things that should have come to the surface,but were never brought to the light,for seasons that could never be explained. shelterd amist the crimes of nature,smothered behind the compartments of an indiviual's mind. so  bodily wrapped up in the greed of a surpassed/looked over....

community of the invisibles.

 

break loose,and walk those forbidden avenues,and claim what has always been the mental capacity of a driven force. the history of latter years were always there,to turn back the pages of time,remembering what  was endured by these rough hands,the cough that sometimes reminds me that the dampness of the night,crept ino the body so frail.

 

beautiful and proud, then closeness of the tongue, not to unleash the strength of the mind,but closely kept were the things to come. and the smiles that are now generated when i look upon my loveliness,through the eyes of my sweat,tears,groans,quiet lonely nights,and yes the hollow screams that seem now to fade away.

 

yes,when you look upon the woman addressed as being so "Phenomenal",i gladly accept my brother/sister,for i've earned every stripe that is glistening to be reconized by many. proud as any peacock,strutting like a drum-major through a colorful parade..as beauty far beyond the visual eye. i'm a delight to see,i'm praised upon by all the colors of the rainbow...destined to freely be who i am,a beautiful nubian queen,an essence of intelligence,the wisdom of a ancient godess,the integrity of splendor gracing the pride of her layer,the heart of mother nature  engrafting all that is drawn to her mental&emotional status,never forgetting the impact and left images emerged in their memory....

i am that "Phenomenal Woman"....I'm Me

07/01/09,Ms. Carol Fields Bucks

This poem was inspired by a  very dear friend of mine.

Mr. Samuel "Kojacknoir" Green...

---

"TO MY MOTHER"

today is your special day

to remember it in a delightful way.

 

all the years& the things that you've

done...

 

sharing your love for everyone.

 

knowing the things that you had to

endure,making sure that everything

was so wonderful and pure.

 

teaching us to love and respect everyone,and God the Father and definitely His Son.

 

there were those wonderful times when the family would meet,and the delicious meals we would sit down to eat..

 

they were the most tasty dishes of all times,and now you know what? i'm sharing all of them with mine.

 

remember the times i would fall and scrape my knee,and tenderly you would kiss it,and heal that lil bo-bo

for me?

 

you were the best doctor i'd ever known,never going to school for a license,but to make things better..

you were known..

 

how bout the home made ice cream that i can still see you churn,and the coconut cakes&dishes you so often burned!

 

now burn is a young person's word when something is really neat,so i just thought to slip that in..because mom those dishes were an awesome treat.

 

this special "",that's been designed for you,is sending you much LOVE,for i'll always  be with/near you so true.

 

though you're not with me on your special day,never far in distance for in my heart you'll always stay.

 

share with my aunts that i love them so,and though they are gone,i still hated to see them go.

 

but the joys that will always  be is the moments we share,just you and me.

 

thanks for the encouragement that you always gave,to respect God ..and  His Son that came to  the earth to save.

 

and to this day "MoM" you've continued to be by my side,for in my heart there shall never be any goodbyes.

 

my journals are overflowing with the love i have to share,for through God's goodness He's there everywhere.

 

the tears still comes every now and then,but they are because i miss you,and the smiles/love from within.

 

but i see your face through the family aglow,the children have your features,and this i'm sure you know.

 

their mannerisms,and the look in their eyes,are so much like you...it really makes me cry.

 

Khalil is a replica of you in so many ways,the tenderness of his heart is shown throughout the days.

 

it's as though he knows when things are going wrong,and comes and gives me a hug..the things you so often did..

when i was sweeping them under the rug!/hehe

 

but moms are built with those warning signals,that goes off in a panic alert,that their children need them quickly,even if we had to leave from work.

 

thank you is what i'm saying though the words may seem confused,my appreciation for all that you gave& shared was never one time abused.

 

as a child it's never seen like we see it now,the years of experience,wisdom and knowledge has truly brought us around.

 

often your words spoke of the "flowers" to be given with much love and care, and "MoM",those were the tender moments that we so often shared!

 

though we know not the time,place or the moment we shall also say goodbye...

 

but the preparation is always "daily"..each moment we live on this earthly side!

 

so take this "" that i send to you'all

this day,for surely one moment in time,we'll all be on our way...

 

Loving You Always...

Your Daughter,

Carol Dianne(05/08/09,gone but never forgotten)

battered by the raging tides,
scorned by the mighty winds.
survival is a must . . .
destined to fail,
inclined to reach the highest peak.
left behind without the passing
thoughts of anyone!
surveying the vast arena,
declined to think of the heartache
gone astray.
dreaming is not in the thoughts
and minds of families or friends.
it's gone . . .
it's happened . . .
deal with the now!
travel long, hard
and cut between roadways
nomads to arrive nowhere!
there's no place to go
this was my home . . . nawlins

Carol Fields Bucks

"you grew near...but remained so very far"

what could have possibly been dipicted in my
wording,that could have stirred you in such an
unmerited way?

I thought to have been the closeness
of a friend,not one to allow the easeness of a
lustful thought,or the embedded touch of a roving
eye..

I entered the space of a caring friend,sending
a graceful smile across the waves,to nestle a
smile,not to create mountainous thoughts ,triggered
by a mere smile. nor would i potray you in the
pic,that you shared on last you wrote.

I value the
intimacy of a forever friend,someone that can share
the warmth of a loving conversation,bring the smile
of a new baby in play,sharing a picnic in the bed of
roses that fragrance the smell of a morning dew.

It's the mind that holds the interest of the
heart,stimulate me with the knowledge of your poetry
in song...written only as you can potray.

I'm uniquein the aura of my own sensuality,pardoned only to
me...share the thoughts of your mind with those that
tread in such directions,for the
"TEMPLE" of my heart stated that you weren't as
near in thought as i assumed you to be.

written with
much love& warmth,msblacque

"DISTANT LOVER"
I live in my own lil world, but that's ok they know me here!
listening to the rustling of the leaves wanting to love and wanting to believe.
traveling through matchless grace wanting to belong in some distant place.
words thrown about one sunny day went away gone astray,
feelings that only you could give that touch of splendor ended in fear.
cries so loud in the middle of the night,why has he gone,way out of sight?
can i see him, touch or feel him close? thought he was my heart though i loved him the most! they trashed him saying "he never cared", but men will do that
because they "Desire" to be there! warm my bed in the middle of the night,hands
so rough i jumped in fright. who are you? why are you here? no permission given yet
i still have that fear! as i look into his eyes all aglow.. you're not him for you i don't even know! he offered to console all the hurtful pain,but all that was in me..called out your name!
can you Rub my feet with much loving tender care, and convince me that you'll always going to be there? no lies will ever hold because if i "let go"...you'll only bring pain to my Soul!
love doesn't come cheap yet it doesn't have a price....i'll find Love again and it'll surely be nice! i'm who i am and thank God for his Love,He"s abled me to forgive through the Love from above. there's much to do,and a Lovely Life to Live,and i'll never Forget=The Love I Have To Give!
until that day...it'll surely come... when to that Paradise "I shall be done"! to leave this home where i'll dwell no more,and meet my Loveones on that "Distant Shore"" until this day arrives for me,i'll continue to share my Love both open and honestly,and dwell with the one that's Destined for me!
Written with Love
Sealed with a kiss
by ms. C.F.Bucks/10/20/07

WHAT A BEAUTY THAT WE'RE TO BEHOLD THE BLESSINGS OF CHRISTMAS..AND THE JOYS  OF OLD.   THE CHILDREN ALL EXCITED BY THE NEWNESS OF  TOYS,BRINGING THE LAUGHTER FROM THE GIRLS AND THE  CHEERS OF THE BOYS.   THE MOMS AND THE  DADS ARE SO DELIGHTED TO SEE,THE SMILES ON THE FACES OF THEIR FAMILIES.   AS I SIT AND THINK OF THE DAYS OF OLD,AND THE WONDERFUL TIMES SPENT WITH THE WEATHER BEING SO COLD!      I MEAN THE SNOW THAT FELL SO BRISKLY ON THE GROUND,SHOWED THE BEAUTY SO RADIANT..AND  WE LOVED HAVING IT AROUND.   THE SCHOOLS WOULD BE CLOSED FOR WEEKS AT THE TIME...AND WE ENJOYED THE COMPANY OF FRIENDS BEING AROUND.   THE  HOT CHOCOLATE&EGGNOG THAT OUR MOM OFTEN MADE,WARMED  OUR BODIES BEFORE SENDING US OFF TO BED.   THOSE WERE THE DAYS THAT SHALL ALWAYS REMAINED ETCHED IN MY MIND,THEY WERE OF THE FAMILIES SO LOVED AND SO KIND.   CAN YOU FEEL THOSE DAYS,AND WONDER WHERE THEY WENT...WE WERE THE KIDS THEN AND ...  NOW THOSE DAYS ARE WELL SPENT.   FOR THE DAYS OF OLD HAS COME AND GONE..NEVER TO BE SHARED ^ NEVER TO BE  BORNED!   WHY BORN? ...YOU ASK! BECAUSE I CAN PULL UP THE LAUGHTER.EVEN THE HUGGGGGGGGS EVEN MORE,MOM WAS THE SWEETEST AND HER LOVE WAS THERE TO ADORE.   SHE LOVED HER CHILDREN,AND SHARED EVERY MOMENT OF HER LIFE..A BEAUTY TO BEHOLD,AND VOTED THE WORLDS "GREATEST" WIFE!   THANK GOD FOR  THE VIDEO OF THE PAST FOR IT HAS BROUGHT THE EXPERIENCES OF LIFE...WE'VE MATURED OVER THE YEARS ...MET WITH DISAPPOINTMENTS AND DEFINITELY  ENCOUNTERED MUCH STRIFE.   BUT THAT'S LIFE AND IT DOES GO ON FOR NOW WE HAVE OUR FAMILIES...AND MAINTAINING OUR OWN.   THIS YEAR SHALL BE  EVEN BETTER THAN THE ONE LAST SPENT,IMPROVING "MY SELF",AND NOT REPEATING   THE DENTS!   THEY CONSIST OF THE THINGS THAT I ALLOWED TO PULL ME ASTRAY,FROM THE  THE ZEAL THAT  SPEARHEADS ME FORWARD..AND CLOUDS MY MIND WITH DISMAY....   SO WHEN THOSE RESOLUTIONS ARE MADE,BE SURE TO HAVE "YOU" IN CHECK,IF NOT MY FRIENDS YOU'LL DUPLICATE THE SAME THINGS YOU  SO OFTEN "MET"!   I THANK GOD FOR ALL THE INDIVIDUALS I'VE MET ALONG MY WAY..FOR THE ROAD WAS PAVED AND (DID) SHINE ON ANY GIVEN DAY.   THERE'S GOING TO BE TRIALS&ERRORS,AND THEY ARE SURELY GOING TO COME...BUT JUST CONTINUE TO STRIVE FOR  HEAVEN'S GATE,AND GOD WILL ONE DAY CARRY YOU HOME.   MUCH LOVE TO ALL OF YOU,BE SAFE OUT THERE,HUGGGGG  THOSE BABIES&KEEP THOSE LOVEONE CLOSE IN CONTACT...   GOD IS NOT THROUGH WITH YOU YET! FROM MY FAMILY TO YOURS...   MERRY CHRISTMAS& A BLESSED NEW YEAR...2009 THE CROWN&GLORY